106 Notable Quotes By Carol Burnett For A Perfect Day
Carol Burnett is an acclaimed American comedian and actress famous for her role in ‘The Carol Burnett Show’. She is the perfect example of ‘rags to riches’ story as she has gone through various hardships to become successful and famous. She was interested in being a playwright and she took acting classes which ignited her passion for acting and she pursued an acting career. She started performing with various theater groups during which a patron was fascinated by her performance and gave her a loan to go to New York in search of better opportunities. She made her debut on television with a small appearance in a popular children’s show. She further got a prominent role in the ‘Gary Moore Show’ where her performance was appreciated and was followed by various offers for television shows. Her fame and popularity as an entertainer helped her bag ‘The Carol Burnett Show’. This show turned out to be a big hit and ran successfully for 11 consecutive seasons making it the most notable work of Carol’s career. She has also appeared in various films. Her significant contributions to the entertainment have been honored with various renowned awards including multiple ‘Golden Globe Awards’. Her quotes and thoughts have been excerpted from her shows, films and life. Her thoughts and quotations tackle the most serious and sensitive topics in a subtle tone. Here are few notable quotes by Carol Burnett that will brighten up your day.
No one ever said life was fair. Just Eventful. Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me. Words, once they are printed, have a life of their own. You have to go through the falling down in order to learn to walk. It helps to know that you can survive it. That's an education in itself. When you have a dream, you've got to grab it and never let go. Because nobody goes though life without a scar. Everybody I know who is funny, it's in them. You can teach timing, or some people are able to tell a joke, though I don't like to tell jokes. But I think you have to be born with a sense of humor and a sense of timing. It's also selfish because it makes you feel good when you help others. I've been helped by acts of kindness from strangers. That's why we're here, after all, to help others. When things are a disappointment, try not to be so discouraged. I come from Texas, and my grandmother and mother were born in Arkansas. I'm so happy with what has happened in my life. We don't stop going to school when we graduate. Giving birth is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head. We all get where we're going by circuitous journeys, and some of the setbacks are warranted. Because nobody goes through life without a scar. I love the writing. I love the idea of typing and seeing it on the computer and printing it out myself and, you know, moving sentences around. I like that. I have always grown from my problems and challenges, from the things that don't work out, that's when I've really learned. I liked myself better when I wasn't me. I never regretted turning down anything, I never regretted losing a job because I always felt something else was out there. Cavort, dear, just cavort I wanted to be on Broadway, but in musical comedy. When I was little I would always stand in front of a mirror and cross my eyes. Then my mother would come in and say, "Stop that, nothing will ever come of it! I think the reason I was successful is that I was never cynical. My grandmother and I would go see movies, and we'd come back to the apartment - we had a one-room apartment in Hollywood - and I would kind of lock myself in this little dressing room area with a cracked mirror on the door and act out what I had just seen. I don't have false teeth. Do you think I'd buy teeth like these? I eat very well, and I do Pilates. I had always been quiet and studious in school. I was the high school editor of the newspaper. I never felt cynical, and I never felt that I couldn't do what I wanted to do. I didn't really get comfortable until I got to UCLA, and I had to take an acting course because I was studying theater arts. I was very entertained by Betty Grable and Judy Garland. It's not a bad thing to be able to do many things onstage. If you're an entertainer, you should be able to entertain. I'm proud to say that I'm not a one-trick pony. When I was starting out in this business, that was the norm. You did it all. You looked around, and entertainers could dance, sing, play the piano, act, make you laugh. I have an iPhone, and I can text, and I can use the phone, and I can even take pictures with it. I love to write. I have always loved writing. That was my first love. When I went to New York to try and make it, I never thought it wouldn't happen. You have to really want it, and don't take it personally if you don't get a job. Because sometimes you're not the type. And sometimes it's somebody else's turn. Edgy is fine - I'm not a prude by any stretch of the imagination - but what's wrong with a good ol' belly laugh? I miss that. It's almost impossible to be funnier than the people in Washington. But I didn't ask to have somebody nose around in my private life. I didn't even ask to be famous. All I asked was to be able to earn a living making people laugh. Adolescence is just one big walking pimple. I don't watch sitcoms. I really don't. My problem with them is they take so long to film them that there's no spontaneity. I want to see that. I've always been optimistic. And I have a feeling that it happened because of going to all those movies with my grandmother in the '40s because there was no cynicism. I love 'Modern Family.' And I love 'Glee' - the singing, the music - Jane Lynch just kills me. I'm like your mother, your sister, whatever. My preference is for people who can do sketch comedy or situational comedy, where it's not a joke, but it's telling a story. Jimmy Stewart and Lucille Ball were so unique. My first book was an open letter to my three daughters. I love Maya Rudolph. She's very multitalented herself. Kristin Wiig I think is brilliant. I was raised going to the movies with my grandmother as a kid. And then I'd come home, and my best friend and I would act out the films that we saw. I am not a joke-teller. Stand-up, I couldn't do. I prefer doing TV, where it can be different every time. I loved the Kennedy Center Honors because you just sit there, smile, wave, and cry. I'm hooked on Glenn Close in 'Damages.' If I go to a party, I'm not one to be the funniest person in the room at all. Steve Martin in 'All of Me,' when he did that whole thing where he was possessed by the spirit in his body? It was brilliant. My mother was very funny. My dad had a great sense of humor. My grandmother, too. I'm into 'House of Cards.' 'Breaking Bad' - my God, did I binge on that! When I left 'The Garry Moore Show,' I signed a 10-year contract with CBS. I do think there are some great female comics: Tina Fey, Amy Poehler, Kristen Wiig, Maya Rudolph. They're the whole ball of wax. I struggled for a while, but when I was cast in an Off Broadway show called 'Once Upon a Mattress,' that kind of put me on the map. I can't tell a joke to save my soul. It's just not my thing, though I love to listen to jokes. I was once asked to do my Tarzan yell at Bergdorf Goodman, and a guard burst in with a gun! Now I only do it under controlled circumstances. I don't eat much meat, fish, or poultry. My interesting diet tips are eat early and don't nosh between meals. I mean, I can pack it away. You know, one wonderful thing that came out of my Enquirer experience is that, in my case, it was ruled tabloids are magazines. Which means they didn't have the protection that a newspaper has. My grandmother and I saw an average of eight movies a week, double features, second run. Originally, I came from Texas, and we lived on - I guess you'd call it welfare, what we called relief. I'm not a person who likes to confront. It all happened the way it was supposed to. I wouldn't change anything. I had such a great run. Just scream! You vent, and the body just feels good after a good old yell. My childhood was rough, we were poor and my parents were alcoholics, but nobody was mean. I knew I was loved. We were on welfare, but I never felt abandoned or unloved. I do the 'New York Times' crossword puzzle every morning to keep the old grey matter ticking. In '57, I got a job at the Blue Angel nightclub, and a gentleman named Ken Welch wrote all my material for me. I lived at a place called the Rehearsal Club that was actually the basis for a play called Stage Door. Celebrity was a long time in coming; it will go away. Everything goes away. I really enjoy connecting with the audience. I had a good loud voice and I wasn't afraid to be goofy or zany. But I don't begrudge anybody, because I know how hard it is to have that dream and to make it happen, whether or not it's just to put a roof over your head and food on the table. As far as sitcoms go, I thought Jenna Elfman in 'Dharma and Greg' was a wonderful physical comedienne who had great timing. On the good days, my mother would haul out the ukulele and we'd sit around the kitchen table - it was a cardboard table with a linoleum top - and sing. Well, I don't know how astute I am, but I did want to be a journalist when I was growing up. Funny is funny. I dare anyone to look at Tim Conway and Harvey Korman doing the dentist sketch, which is more than 40 years old, and not scream with laughter. I think the hardest thing to do in the world, show-business-wise, is write comedy. Ask anyone who's successful how they got there, you're going to hear a different story. My favorite is doing the television show, as a variety show, every week. If the show wasn't that great one week, we could always come back and apologize, you know? I very much enjoyed doing 'Law & Order,' playing a killer - that was fun, and they had a family feel around the set, so it was a happy show to do even though the subject matter was quite the opposite. I loved doing 'The Family' with Eunice and Mama. They were very interesting because there were no jokes written into those sketches. It was all character-driven. And sometimes it got a little heavy. My favourite comedian, of course, is Tim Conway. He has a way about him - being that belly-laugh kind of funny, and he has the improvisational skills, too. I've never seen anybody better. I've always been able to recount things, and I have a really good memory about dialog and what people have said before and this and that. It costs a lot to sue a magazine, and it's too bad that we don't have a system where the losing team has to pay the winning team's lawyers. I'm not always optimistic. You wouldn't have all cylinders cooking if you were always like Mary Poppins. Because of YouTube, I'm getting fan mail from 10-year-olds and teenagers and college kids. I wish my mother had left me something about how she felt growing up. I wish my grandmother had done the same. I wanted my girls to know me. I am not a person who yells at all, but I realized that I have always felt so good after doing the Tarzan yell, after doing Charo, or screaming as Eunice.
I was kind of shy as a kid. I was a pretty good student. I was a wallflower, or nerd, if you will.
What I like to write about is stuff I know. I don't think I could write a novel. I don't think I have it in me to come up with those kinds of characters.
I'm really not that funny in real life! But I am the best audience one could find. I love to laugh.
Comedy is tragedy - plus time.
I'm glad I was born when I was. My time was the golden age of variety. If I were starting out again now, maybe things would happen for me, but it certainly would not be on a variety show with 28 musicians, 12 dancers, two major guest stars, 50 costumes a week by Bob Mackie. The networks just wouldn't spend the money today.
My grandmother and I followed my mother here, to a house a block north of Hollywood Boulevard but a million miles away from Hollywood, if you know what I mean. We would hang out behind the ropes and look at the movie stars arriving at the premieres. I had it in my contract with CBS, a very weird clause that was never written before and certainly not since, that if I wanted to do a variety show within the first five years of the contract, CBS would have to put it on for 30 shows.