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105 Witty Quotes By Matthew Perry That Reveal His Innate Humor

Famous As: Best Known for His Role of 'Chandler Bing' on the TV Sitcom 'Friends'
Born On: August 19, 1969
Born In: Williamstown, Massachusetts, United States
Age: 53 Years

Matthew Perry did not say it in so many words; but he was born a comedian, using humor to diffuse deeply emotional situations from his early years. However, in an interview, he has said that to be a comedian, one has to have some darkness behind it and that he draws on his past. Born in Massachusetts, raised in Ottawa, he moved to Los Angeles at the age of fifteen to pursue a career in acting. In this long journey, he has gathered a huge cache of experience. Let us now look into some of his quotes and find about the man he is, his sense of style, what he thinks about addiction and a lot of other things.

There's nothing better than a world where everybody's just trying to make each other laugh.

There's nothing better than a world where everybody's just trying to make each other laugh.

Matthew Perry
'Friends' was a magical thing, and no one's going to ever have anything like that again.

'Friends' was a magical thing, and no one's going to ever have anything like that again.

Matthew Perry
I'm very, very jealous of guys who just go and decide to party and then can work the next day.

I'm very, very jealous of guys who just go and decide to party and then can work the next day.

Matthew Perry
I play a guy who is 40. And I am a very good actor, because I'm 41.

I play a guy who is 40. And I am a very good actor, because I'm 41.

Matthew Perry
I really lived life to its fullest and that got me in trouble from time to time.

I really lived life to its fullest and that got me in trouble from time to time.

Matthew Perry
When I die, I'd like 'Friends' to be listed behind 'helping people.'

When I die, I'd like 'Friends' to be listed behind 'helping people.'

Matthew Perry
Well, I was lucky enough to be involved in about 19 failures at an early age, so I'm realistic about the success I'm having and how quickly it can go away. What's important is to be smart about it.

Well, I was lucky enough to be involved in about 19 failures at an early age, so I'm realistic about the success I'm having and how quickly it can go away. What's important is to be smart about it.

Matthew Perry
I'm making plans to go away for a month to focus on my sobriety and to continue my life in recovery. Please enjoy making fun of me on the world wide web.

I'm making plans to go away for a month to focus on my sobriety and to continue my life in recovery. Please enjoy making fun of me on the world wide web.

Matthew Perry
I don't need to be reminded that I was on 'Friends.' I remember - some of it, anyway.

I don't need to be reminded that I was on 'Friends.' I remember - some of it, anyway.

Matthew Perry
In television or a movie I bring my own ego and consequently can mess up. In the theatre I learnt very quickly to shut up and listen. Now I am able to get out of my own way.

In television or a movie I bring my own ego and consequently can mess up. In the theatre I learnt very quickly to shut up and listen. Now I am able to get out of my own way.

Matthew Perry
I was like: I'm going to ask her [Julia Roberts] out but I'm going to be very nervous about it. Then she said yes, I got even more nervous.

I was like: I'm going to ask her [Julia Roberts] out but I'm going to be very nervous about it. Then she said yes, I got even more nervous.

Matthew Perry
So I'm reading a book on my new iPad, but can't the iPad read it for me? Do I have to do everything?

So I'm reading a book on my new iPad, but can't the iPad read it for me? Do I have to do everything?

Matthew Perry
If I hadn't had the experience of being famous, I would have searched for it my whole life. I would have just gone on and on trying to find it.

If I hadn't had the experience of being famous, I would have searched for it my whole life. I would have just gone on and on trying to find it.

Matthew Perry
Chandler's the guy everybody thinks will do well with women, but he thinks too much and says the wrong thing.

Chandler's the guy everybody thinks will do well with women, but he thinks too much and says the wrong thing.

Matthew Perry
I'm just glad that the whole John Wayne persona of a man is sort of old school now, because I'd never be able to do that. If that was the going rate today, I wouldn't be working.

I'm just glad that the whole John Wayne persona of a man is sort of old school now, because I'd never be able to do that. If that was the going rate today, I wouldn't be working.

Matthew Perry
I'd say that on 'Friends' my character was the guy bouncing around the room. I'm no longer that guy, necessarily, in my life. I used to be. But I'm not now.

I'd say that on 'Friends' my character was the guy bouncing around the room. I'm no longer that guy, necessarily, in my life. I used to be. But I'm not now.

Matthew Perry
When people try to take [smoking] away from me I say, 'hey, I stopped everything else.' But, I have to battle that one, too.

When people try to take [smoking] away from me I say, 'hey, I stopped everything else.' But, I have to battle that one, too.

Matthew Perry
Ninety percent of video game AI really is pretty damn bad. I think that's actually why it's so much fun to shoot things. Because the AI is so bad and the characters are so annoying.

Ninety percent of video game AI really is pretty damn bad. I think that's actually why it's so much fun to shoot things. Because the AI is so bad and the characters are so annoying.

Matthew Perry
It's not foreign for me to be talking about my problems in circles.

It's not foreign for me to be talking about my problems in circles.

Matthew Perry
I'm a sensitive guy. If you are a woman and you're in any kind of emotional duress and you write a song about it, I'll buy you album.

I'm a sensitive guy. If you are a woman and you're in any kind of emotional duress and you write a song about it, I'll buy you album.

Matthew Perry
I've been accused of not really paying attention to a sentence unless my name comes up in it twice.

I've been accused of not really paying attention to a sentence unless my name comes up in it twice.

Matthew Perry
I've just found out there are pages on the internet dedicated to whether I'm gay or not.

I've just found out there are pages on the internet dedicated to whether I'm gay or not.

Matthew Perry
I don't have a very 'masculine' taste in music. I get a lot of heat from my friends about that.

I don't have a very 'masculine' taste in music. I get a lot of heat from my friends about that.

Matthew Perry
I'm glad that life isn't like a Christmas song, because if my friends and I were building a snowman and it suddenly came alive when we put a hat on it, I'd probably freak and stab it to death with an icicle.

I'm glad that life isn't like a Christmas song, because if my friends and I were building a snowman and it suddenly came alive when we put a hat on it, I'd probably freak and stab it to death with an icicle.

Matthew Perry
I have a dark side; it's been pretty well documented. It wouldn't be bad to show that in some light in my work...It's something I no longer fear doing and am actually excited about doing.

I have a dark side; it's been pretty well documented. It wouldn't be bad to show that in some light in my work...It's something I no longer fear doing and am actually excited about doing.

Matthew Perry
I gravitate towards sort of broken characters who try to be better people.

I gravitate towards sort of broken characters who try to be better people.

Matthew Perry
I learned to fall down early in life - I was, like, six - because I realized it was a way to make girls laugh.

I learned to fall down early in life - I was, like, six - because I realized it was a way to make girls laugh.

Matthew Perry
If there's a silence in a room I'll try to fill it as soon as humanly possible.

If there's a silence in a room I'll try to fill it as soon as humanly possible.

Matthew Perry
In a perfect world, my tennis game gets better. I have kids and a beautiful wife and live on some hill somewhere that's not in Los Angeles. And the script that Tom Hanks just barely turned down gets in my hands.

In a perfect world, my tennis game gets better. I have kids and a beautiful wife and live on some hill somewhere that's not in Los Angeles. And the script that Tom Hanks just barely turned down gets in my hands.

Matthew Perry
I've been accused of not really paying attention to a sentence unless my name comes up in it twice.

I've been accused of not really paying attention to a sentence unless my name comes up in it twice.

Matthew Perry
When I die, I'd like' Friends' to be listed behind 'helping people.'

When I die, I'd like' Friends' to be listed behind 'helping people.'

Matthew Perry
I don't have a very 'masculine' taste in music. I get a lot of heat from my friends about that.

I don't have a very 'masculine' taste in music. I get a lot of heat from my friends about that.

Matthew Perry
I'm very similar to Chandler in many ways, although Chandler is funnier than me, and Chandler absolutely hates his job whereas I absolutely love my job.

I'm very similar to Chandler in many ways, although Chandler is funnier than me, and Chandler absolutely hates his job whereas I absolutely love my job.

Matthew Perry
I became a big Kings fan, and then later on my hometown of Ottawa got a team, so then I was very, very torn. I just love both of those teams very much.

I became a big Kings fan, and then later on my hometown of Ottawa got a team, so then I was very, very torn. I just love both of those teams very much.

Matthew Perry
In high school, my prom date fooled around with another guy - on prom night!

In high school, my prom date fooled around with another guy - on prom night!

Matthew Perry
I know Chandler is similar to me. But if you watched my life for a week, there would be many more boring parts.

I know Chandler is similar to me. But if you watched my life for a week, there would be many more boring parts.

Matthew Perry
'Friends' was a magical thing, and no one's going to ever have anything like that again.

'Friends' was a magical thing, and no one's going to ever have anything like that again.

Matthew Perry
If I hadn't had the experience of being famous, I would have searched for it my whole life. I would have just gone on and on trying to find it.

If I hadn't had the experience of being famous, I would have searched for it my whole life. I would have just gone on and on trying to find it.

Matthew Perry
It's tough to have a movie-star persona when you're on a show as successful as 'Friends.'

It's tough to have a movie-star persona when you're on a show as successful as 'Friends.'

Matthew Perry
I've been on a show before where I was on a billboard and then, after like three or four weeks, they took the billboard down and replaced it with nothing. Took my face down and put a white board up.

I've been on a show before where I was on a billboard and then, after like three or four weeks, they took the billboard down and replaced it with nothing. Took my face down and put a white board up.

Matthew Perry
It's not foreign for me to be talking about my problems in circles.

It's not foreign for me to be talking about my problems in circles.

Matthew Perry
Like, my house has a nice view, because, you know, I was on 'Friends.'

Like, my house has a nice view, because, you know, I was on 'Friends.'

Matthew Perry
They say that women like a man who can make them laugh, and I find that if you can make a woman laugh on the first and second dates, then you're doing well.

They say that women like a man who can make them laugh, and I find that if you can make a woman laugh on the first and second dates, then you're doing well.

Matthew Perry
There was a time when I wasn't working a lot. It ebbs and flows. Mostly I was just living my life and playing 'Fallout 3,' a very fun game.

There was a time when I wasn't working a lot. It ebbs and flows. Mostly I was just living my life and playing 'Fallout 3,' a very fun game.

Matthew Perry
To me, writing is remembering something funny that happened, or maybe something I said seven years ago.

To me, writing is remembering something funny that happened, or maybe something I said seven years ago.

Matthew Perry
I've certainly had a lot of experiences in my life where I was much too self-centered.

I've certainly had a lot of experiences in my life where I was much too self-centered.

Matthew Perry
I would always be the kid that got in trouble in school, that's for sure, for joking around.

I would always be the kid that got in trouble in school, that's for sure, for joking around.

Matthew Perry
The thing that I'm most proud of in my life is that if a stranger came up to me and said, 'I can't stop drinking. I can't stop drinking. Can you help me?' I can say, 'Yes, I can help you.'

The thing that I'm most proud of in my life is that if a stranger came up to me and said, 'I can't stop drinking. I can't stop drinking. Can you help me?' I can say, 'Yes, I can help you.'

Matthew Perry
I loved playing Chandler. I grew up playing that part.

I loved playing Chandler. I grew up playing that part.

Matthew Perry
I am fine with the fact that some of my hair is gray. If it was all gray overnight, that would be a scary thing.

I am fine with the fact that some of my hair is gray. If it was all gray overnight, that would be a scary thing.

Matthew Perry
That's like the greatest experiences of my life still, 'Friends,' so it's not something I want to get away from, but I do want to try and show something new.

That's like the greatest experiences of my life still, 'Friends,' so it's not something I want to get away from, but I do want to try and show something new.

Matthew Perry
I used to spend a lot of time just thinking about myself, thinking that the party started when I showed up.

I used to spend a lot of time just thinking about myself, thinking that the party started when I showed up.

Matthew Perry
I think we need to educate our doctors about addiction.

I think we need to educate our doctors about addiction.

Matthew Perry
I don't need to be reminded that I was on 'Friends.' I remember - some of it, anyway.

I don't need to be reminded that I was on 'Friends.' I remember - some of it, anyway.

Matthew Perry
I certainly wear my heart on my sleeve, and I think that comes out in the characters that I play. There's a yearning, or something, that comes out of me that people relate to.

I certainly wear my heart on my sleeve, and I think that comes out in the characters that I play. There's a yearning, or something, that comes out of me that people relate to.

Matthew Perry
When I was, like, 15, I realized there could be a career in making people laugh - like, you could get paid to do it. That was insane to me.

When I was, like, 15, I realized there could be a career in making people laugh - like, you could get paid to do it. That was insane to me.

Matthew Perry
I'm just glad that the whole John Wayne persona of a man is sort of old school now, because I'd never be able to do that. If that was the going rate today, I wouldn't be working.

I'm just glad that the whole John Wayne persona of a man is sort of old school now, because I'd never be able to do that. If that was the going rate today, I wouldn't be working.

Matthew Perry
I think if you look back at all those great comedies on television in the past, it's all lovable losers that gathered together - 'Taxi' and 'Cheers,' 'Seinfeld' and 'Friends.'

I think if you look back at all those great comedies on television in the past, it's all lovable losers that gathered together - 'Taxi' and 'Cheers,' 'Seinfeld' and 'Friends.'

Matthew Perry
'The Whole Nine Yards' I liked right away. It was kind of a dark comedy at first. And just the idea of being in a movie with Bruce Willis was pretty exciting.

'The Whole Nine Yards' I liked right away. It was kind of a dark comedy at first. And just the idea of being in a movie with Bruce Willis was pretty exciting.

Matthew Perry
I need a woman to have a quirky sense of humor. There's a bunch of jokes I use, and if she doesn't get them, she's probably not for me.

I need a woman to have a quirky sense of humor. There's a bunch of jokes I use, and if she doesn't get them, she's probably not for me.

Matthew Perry
Nine times out of 10, women don't want to fix a problem, they just want to be understood. I'll never get that.

Nine times out of 10, women don't want to fix a problem, they just want to be understood. I'll never get that.

Matthew Perry
As for my personal life, I'd love to start a family of my own. I think I'd make a great dad, and I think shortly I would make a great husband.

As for my personal life, I'd love to start a family of my own. I think I'd make a great dad, and I think shortly I would make a great husband.

Matthew Perry
I would like you all to give me a round of applause as I have not crashed my car in over 15 months.

I would like you all to give me a round of applause as I have not crashed my car in over 15 months.

Matthew Perry
Ninety percent of video game AI really is pretty damn bad. I think that's actually why it's so much fun to shoot things. Because the AI is so bad and the characters are so annoying.

Ninety percent of video game AI really is pretty damn bad. I think that's actually why it's so much fun to shoot things. Because the AI is so bad and the characters are so annoying.

Matthew Perry
I got sober because I was worried I was going to die next year.

I got sober because I was worried I was going to die next year.

Matthew Perry
If there's a silence in a room I'll try to fill it as soon as humanly possible.

If there's a silence in a room I'll try to fill it as soon as humanly possible.

Matthew Perry
As an actor, being on autopilot is the worst thing possible.

As an actor, being on autopilot is the worst thing possible.

Matthew Perry
I love the idea of 'the one' but I actually believe that there isn't a Miss Right. There are 12,000 Miss Rights out there and it's all timing.

I love the idea of 'the one' but I actually believe that there isn't a Miss Right. There are 12,000 Miss Rights out there and it's all timing.

Matthew Perry
I've just found out there are pages on the internet dedicated to whether I'm gay or not.

I've just found out there are pages on the internet dedicated to whether I'm gay or not.

Matthew Perry
Well, I was lucky enough to be involved in about 19 failures at an early age, so I'm realistic about the success I'm having and how quickly it can go away. What's important is to be smart about it.

Well, I was lucky enough to be involved in about 19 failures at an early age, so I'm realistic about the success I'm having and how quickly it can go away. What's important is to be smart about it.

Matthew Perry
After I got my first laugh on stage, I was hooked.

After I got my first laugh on stage, I was hooked.

Matthew Perry
I have what I like to call a 'chinneck.' My chin just flows rather easily into my neck.

I have what I like to call a 'chinneck.' My chin just flows rather easily into my neck.

Matthew Perry
My sense of style is an old Polo shirt, jeans and, unfortunately for the longest time, white running shoes, which was not attractive. The one thing I've learned about clothes is to ask a girl.

My sense of style is an old Polo shirt, jeans and, unfortunately for the longest time, white running shoes, which was not attractive. The one thing I've learned about clothes is to ask a girl.

Matthew Perry
I'd say that on 'Friends' my character was the guy bouncing around the room. I'm no longer that guy, necessarily, in my life. I used to be. But I'm not now.

I'd say that on 'Friends' my character was the guy bouncing around the room. I'm no longer that guy, necessarily, in my life. I used to be. But I'm not now.

Matthew Perry
I have a well-documented history of trouble with intimacy.

I have a well-documented history of trouble with intimacy.

Matthew Perry
To be a comedian, you have to have some darkness behind it. I certainly draw on my past, and it helps.

To be a comedian, you have to have some darkness behind it. I certainly draw on my past, and it helps.

Matthew Perry
My feeling on therapy is it's a luxury, and if you're fortunate enough to get some smart people to talk to about life, then that's fortunate and you should go for it.

My feeling on therapy is it's a luxury, and if you're fortunate enough to get some smart people to talk to about life, then that's fortunate and you should go for it.

Matthew Perry
The key to sitcom success is miserable people. If you see a happy couple, it's just gone, like when Sam and Diane got together on Cheers.

The key to sitcom success is miserable people. If you see a happy couple, it's just gone, like when Sam and Diane got together on Cheers.

Matthew Perry
Chandler's the guy everybody thinks will do well with women, but he thinks too much and says the wrong thing.

Chandler's the guy everybody thinks will do well with women, but he thinks too much and says the wrong thing.

Matthew Perry
I have a huge interest in hockey because I grew up in Canada, where it's kind of the law that you love hockey.

I have a huge interest in hockey because I grew up in Canada, where it's kind of the law that you love hockey.

Matthew Perry
When I was younger, I used humour as a tool to avoid getting too serious with people - if there was deep emotional stuff going on, then I would crack a joke to defuse the situation.

When I was younger, I used humour as a tool to avoid getting too serious with people - if there was deep emotional stuff going on, then I would crack a joke to defuse the situation.

Matthew Perry
My favorite six words in recovery are: trust God, clean house, and help others.

My favorite six words in recovery are: trust God, clean house, and help others.

Matthew Perry
A lot of people think that addiction is a choice. A lot of people think it's a matter of will. That has not been my experience. I don't find it to have anything to do with strength.

A lot of people think that addiction is a choice. A lot of people think it's a matter of will. That has not been my experience. I don't find it to have anything to do with strength.

Matthew Perry
If I could walk into the 'Friends' audition again and go or not go, I have to say it's 50-50.

If I could walk into the 'Friends' audition again and go or not go, I have to say it's 50-50.

Matthew Perry
I'm a sensitive guy. If you are a woman and you're in any kind of emotional duress and you write a song about it, I'll buy you album.

I'm a sensitive guy. If you are a woman and you're in any kind of emotional duress and you write a song about it, I'll buy you album.

Matthew Perry

The goal is to have to do the shot again because the camera guy shook a little bit as he was laughing. Without that happening, I'm not happy because there's nothing better for me than a world that everybody's just trying to make each other laugh.

Matthew Perry
The thing is, if I don't have sobriety, I don't have anything.

The thing is, if I don't have sobriety, I don't have anything.

Matthew Perry

I certainly like the rumour that I was the father of Elizabeth Hurley's baby. It made me think I could impregnate women in a different way to everyone else. Elizabeth and I were never alone in a room together, so I must be a very powerful man indeed. Actually, I'm thinking of suing the baby!

Matthew Perry

I grew up babysitting and always enjoyed it. I love family. A couple of my closest friends have kids, and I'm their godfather, and that's one of my greatest pleasures in life, just picking them up from school and hanging out with them.

Matthew Perry

Women always think that I'm Chandler, so if I don't joke around for half an hour they think that something's wrong. Then I explain that I don't have comedy writers scripting everything I'm saying at this particular dinner.

Matthew Perry

I used to be a real prince charming if I went on a date with a girl. But then I'd get to where I was likely to have a stroke from the stress of keeping up my act. I've since learned the key to a good date is to pay attention on her.

Matthew Perry

There are two ways to go when you hit that crossroads in your life: There is the bad way, when you sort of give up, and then there is the really hard way, when you fight back. I went the hard way and came out of it okay. Now, I'm sitting here and doing great.

Matthew Perry

Trying to overcome addiction is one of the hardest things for a person to do. And the fact that I had to do it under the scrutiny of tabloid press at first made it seem even more difficult. But in fact, it oddly ended up being a plus. Because of the tabloid stuff, it wasn't like I could walk into a bar and order a drink.

Matthew Perry

I can tell if someone is talking to me because I'm on 'Friends' or cause they just think I'm neat. You know I don't think I've ever spent more than five or ten minutes with somebody who was ogling me because they recognized me from the show.

Matthew Perry

Vicodin, I got addicted to that little pill. The reason I don't talk about it too much in the press is because it isn't funny, and I love to be funny in interviews. If you joke about that period in your life, it doesn't seem right.

Matthew Perry

Women always think that I'm Chandler, so if I don't joke around for half an hour, they think that something's wrong. Then I explain that I don't have comedy writers scripting everything I'm saying at this particular dinner.

Matthew Perry

I never really thought of myself as a physical comedian. But when I was a kid, I used to, you know, pretend to trip over things to make girls laugh in school and stuff like that. So I kind of learned how to fall without hurting yourself.

Matthew Perry

I was a very good tennis player in Ottawa, Canada - nationally ranked when I was, like, 13. Then I moved to Los Angeles when I was 15, and everyone in L.A. just killed me. I was pretty great in Canada. Not so much in Los Angeles.

Matthew Perry

I learned a valuable lesson doing 'Mr. Sunshine,' which is that I didn't want to be in charge because it's too much. Being in charge and acting in every scene was just too difficult. It's like eating dinner in a moving golf cart every night.

Matthew Perry

I went to a high school that didn't have many people in it. There were, like, 60 people in my senior class. There was a group of cool kids and a group of really dorky kids, and I was probably the coolest of the really dorky kids.

Matthew Perry

I would love to have kids one day. In fact, I'm pretty good with them. I grew up with five half-siblings, the youngest of whom is 11 years younger than me, so I think I learned some pretty cool parenting skills quite early on in life.

Matthew Perry

My favorite actor was, is, Michael Keaton. Certainly growing up, in the movie 'Night Shift' he did something brand new that I hadn't seen before that we all steal from now. And then it was in 1987 he did the movie 'Clean and Sober' and 'Beetlejuice' in the same year, and that was when I said, 'Wow, that's what I want to do.'

Matthew Perry