Authors: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

A collection of Tina Fey quotes about perfection, opportunity, humor, boss, emotion, patriarchy, slut-shaming, ambition, confidence, love, life and much more.

100 Tina Fey Quotes That Are Just So Wise

Quick Facts

Famous As: American actress

Born On: May 18, 1970

Born In: Upper Darby Township, Pennsylvania, U.S.

Unapologetic, unbreakable lady-boss Tina Fey is an inspiring example of 'Girl Power'. Hailing from a non-cinema background, Tina grew up to be an actress, comedian, theatre artist, screen writer and producer. She's remembered for her unbelievable acting talent in '30 Rock', 'Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt' and 'Saturday night'. Scarred from a traumatic childhood experience, where a stranger slashed her face, Tina proudly wears the knife-mark without any worries. This didn't prevent her from growing into a beautiful celebrity. She proved to the world that women can be great comedians. She has a long list of awards to her 'wall of fame' including 2 Golden Globes, 4 Writer's Guild of America, 9 Emmies and 5 Screen Actors Guild awards for 17 movies and 19 TV shows. Her sensational autography 'Bossypants' was nominated for the Grammy Award. The book became a bestseller within five weeks. Fey is the youngest recipient of Mark Twain Prize for American Humor for her comic skills. She and Amy ruled the 70th Golden Globe Awards as hosts, generating the highest ratings among other award ceremonies of the decade. Mother of two kids, Fey isn't bothered by old age. She doesn't get caught up in Hollywood competition and often hands out an advice or two for teenagers and women. Her life has been very inspiring. We have curated some of her funniest and most empowering quotes from her speeches, interviews, characters etc. Here are some of Tina Fey's witty quotes about motherhood, celebrity, homophobia, strip club, life etc.

Do your thing and don't care if they like it.

Tina Fey

Some people say, “Never let them see you cry.” I say, if you’re so mad you could just cry, then cry. It terrifies everyone.

Tina Fey

If you retain nothing else, always remember the most important rule of beauty, which is: who cares?

Tina Fey

Gay people don’t actually try to convert people. That’s Jehovah’s Witnesses you’re thinking of.

Tina Fey

To say I’m an overrated troll, when you have never even seen me guard a bridge, is patently unfair.

Tina Fey

My ability to turn good news into anxiety is rivaled only by my ability to turn anxiety into chin acne.

Tina Fey

Whatever the problem, be part of the solution. Don’t just sit around raising questions and pointing out obstacles.

Tina Fey

You can’t be that kid standing at the top of the waterslide, overthinking it. You have to go down the chute.

Tina Fey

By the way, when Oprah Winfrey is suggesting you may have overextended yourself, you need to examine your fucking life.

Tina Fey

In most cases being a good boss means hiring talented people and then getting out of their way.

Tina Fey

I feel about Photoshop the way some people feel about abortion. It is appalling and a tragic reflection on the moral decay of our society…unless I need it, in which case, everybody be cool.

Tina Fey

You could put a blond wig on a hot-water heater and some dude would try to fuck it.

Tina Fey

THERE ARE NO MISTAKES, only opportunities.

Tina Fey

Don't waste your energy trying to change opinions ... Do your thing, and don't care if they like it.

Tina Fey

Whitney Houston’s cover of “I Will Always Love You” was constantly on my FM Walkman radio around that time. I think that made me cry because I associated it with absolutely no one.

Tina Fey

Photoshop is just like makeup. When it’s done well it looks great, and when it’s overdone you look like a crazy asshole.

Tina Fey

Obviously, as an adult I realize this girl-on-girl sabotage is the third worst kind of female behavior, right behind saying "like" all the time and leaving your baby in a dumpster.

Tina Fey

You can tell how smart people are by what they laugh at.

Tina Fey

[T]he definition of 'crazy' in show business is a woman who keeps talking even after no one wants to fuck her anymore.

Tina Fey

It will never be perfect, but perfect is overrated. Perfect is boring on live TV.

Tina Fey

When choosing sexual partners, remember: Talent is not sexually transmittable.

Tina Fey

The show doesn’t go on because it’s ready; it goes on because it’s 11:30.

Tina Fey

I think someone should design exercise machines that reward people with sex at the end of their workouts, because people will perform superhuman feats for even the faint hope of that.

Tina Fey

What Turning Forty Means to Me I need to take my pants off as soon as I get home. I didn't used to have to do that. But now I do.

Tina Fey

Never tell a crazy person he’s crazy.

Tina Fey

This made no sense to me, probably because I speak English and have never had a head injury.

Tina Fey

Confidence is 10% hard work and 90% delusion.

Tina Fey

And I can see Russia from my house.

Tina Fey

You have to remember that actors are human beings. Which is hard sometimes because they look so much better than human beings.

Tina Fey

(My proudest moment as a child was the time I beat my uncle Pierre at Scrabble with the seven-letter word FARTING.)

Tina Fey

...nothing is creepier than a bunch of adults being very quiet.

Tina Fey

There is no one of-woman-born who does not like Red Lobster cheddar biscuits. Anyone who claims otherwise is a liar and a Socialist.

Tina Fey

No other formula gives your baby a better start in life except that stuff that comes out of you for free.

Tina Fey

It’s a burden, being able to control situations with my hyper-vigilance, but it’s my lot in life.

Tina Fey

You must not look in that mirror at your doughy legs and flat feet, for today is about dreams and illusions, and unfiltered natural daylight is the enemy of dreams.

Tina Fey

You know who DOES have a funny bone in her body? Your Mom every night for a dollar!

Tina Fey

This requires a level of delusion/egomania usually reserved for popes and drag queens

Tina Fey

Ah, babies! They’re more than just adorable little creatures on whom you can blame your farts.

Tina Fey

I was wearing my best Gap turtleneck and my dates were two adult lesbians, so yea, I was pretty cool.

Tina Fey

I’ll be ready for it to happen and that way it won’t happen. It’s a burden, being able to control situations with my hyper-vigilance, but it’s my lot in life.

Tina Fey

Sometimes if you have a difficult decisin to make, just stall until the answer presents itself.

Tina Fey

Say yes and you'll figure it out afterwards.

Tina Fey

It is an impressively arrogant move to conclude that just because you don't like something, it is empirically not good.

Tina Fey

Anytime there's a bad female stand-up somewhere, some dickhead Interblogger will deduce that “women aren't funny.” Using that same math, I can state: Male comedy writers piss in cups.

Tina Fey

[...] things most people do naturally are often inexplicably difficult for me.

Tina Fey

When hiring, mix Harvard Nerds with Chicago Improvisers and stir.

Tina Fey

Am I just chasing it because it's the hardest thing for me to get and I want to prove I can do it?

Tina Fey

I prefer the retro chic of spending Christmas just like Joseph and Mary did - Traveling arduously back to the place of your birth to be counted, with no guarantee of a bed when you get there.

Tina Fey

It's like being a little kid again, parading around in a nightgown tucked into your underpants, believing it looks terrific.

Tina Fey

I want to go to there.

Tina Fey

He alternated between ignoring me and shooting me disdainful looks that clearly said “Who is this ugly off-brand non-sorority girl ruining our homo-erotic bro-times?

Tina Fey

You all watched a sketch about feminism and you didn't even know it because of all the jokes. It's like when Jessica Seinfeld puts spinach in kids' brownies. Suckers!

Tina Fey

Finally the world would see my full range of comedy characters - from grouchy librarian to Russian librarian.

Tina Fey

When actors are too good-looking, I can’t memorize them. For example, I have never seen a picture of Sienna Miller where I didn’t say, “That girl’s pretty. Who is that?

Tina Fey

Now go to bed, you crazy night owl! You have to be at NASA early in the morning. So they can look for your penis with the Hubble telescope.

Tina Fey

That night's show was watched by ten million people, so I guess that director at The Second City who said the audience "didn't want to see a sketch with two women" can go shit in his hat.

Tina Fey

Sometimes you want to have a very productive Saturday to feel that you are in control of your life, which of course you are not.

Tina Fey

Either way, everything will be fine. But if you have an opinion, please feel free to offer it to me through the gap in the door of a public restroom. Everyone else does.

Tina Fey

It’s no more dangerous to society than a radio broadcast of The War of the Worlds.

Tina Fey

...I can't possibly take time off for a second baby, unless I do, in which case that is nobody's business and I'll never regret it for a moment unless it ruins my life.

Tina Fey

It will never be perfect, but perfect is overrated.

Tina Fey

I learned quickly that trying to force Country Folk to love the Big City is like telling your gay cousin, "You just haven't met the right girl yet.

Tina Fey

A combustion engine of ambition and disappointment.

Tina Fey

Tracy: Stop eating people's old french fries, little pigeon. Have some self-respect. Don't you know you can fly?

Tina Fey

I had my hair in a ponytail and looked my trademark exhausted.

Tina Fey

Then she took out a speculum the size of a milk shake machine. Even Michelle Duggar would have flinched at this thing, but I had never seen one before.

Tina Fey

The topic of working moms is a tap-dance recital in a minefield.

Tina Fey

I went back outside and manually released my butt cheeks.

Tina Fey

...the Rule of Agreement reminds you to “respect what your partner has created” and to at least start from an open-minded place. Start with a YES and see where that takes you.

Tina Fey

The same ten minutes that magazines urge me to use for sit-ups and triceps dips, I used for sobbing.

Tina Fey

You have to try your hardest to be at the top of your game and improve every joke you can until the last possible second, and then you have to let it go.

Tina Fey

Seriously, I've just realized that almost everyone is a fraud, so I try not to feel too bad about it.

Tina Fey

...the music seems creepy, like when children sing in a horror movie

Tina Fey

In my limited experience, shows are like children. You can teach them manners and dress them in little sailor suits, but in the end, they're going to be who they're going to be.

Tina Fey

Your initiations are worthwhile.

Tina Fey

When I first set out to ruin SNL, I didn't think anyone would notice, but i persevered because like you trying to a do a nine- piece jigsaw puzzle, it was a labor of love.

Tina Fey

I felt like that character in Flowers for Algernon. Not Charlie, the lady teacher from the college who realizes, 'I've got to stop dry-humping this mentally challenged guy!

Tina Fey

The eyes are the window to where the soul is supposed to be.

Tina Fey

If you're going to expend energy being mad about Photoshop, you'll also have to be mad about earrings. No one's ears are that sparkly!

Tina Fey

If a bout of "creepy face" sets in, the trick is to look away from the camera between shots and turn back only when necessary. This also limits how much of your soul the camera can steal.

Tina Fey

To me YEs, AND means don't be afraid to contribute. It's your responsibility to contribute. Always make sure you're adding something to the discussion. Your initiations are worthwhile.

Tina Fey

How do you juggle it all' people constantly ask me, with an accusatory look in their eyes. 'You're fucking it all up, aren't you' their eyes say.

Tina Fey

To this day, all I know is there are between two and four openings down there and that the set up inside looks vaguely like the Texas Longhorns logo.

Tina Fey

In an attempt to make things easier for myself, which is the basis for all of history's worst decisions [...].

Tina Fey

It was a major and deeply embarrassing teenage revelation. It must be how straight teenage boys feel when they realize those boobs they like have heads attached to them.

Tina Fey

Why can't we accept the human form as it is?" screams no one. I don't know why, but we never have. That's why people wore corsets and neck stretchers and powdered wigs.

Tina Fey

Either way, everything will be fine.

Tina Fey

...my electric-blue-suitmate was an uninhibited vagina about town.

Tina Fey

In other words: Whatever the problem, be part of the solution. Don't just sit around raising questions and pointing out obstacles.

Tina Fey

Bitch get stuff done

Tina Fey

These are dark times. Back in my Wildwood days with Janet, you were either blessed with a beautiful body or not. And if you were not, you could just chill out and learn a trade.

Tina Fey

Donna was an enigma wrapped in bacon wrapped in a crescent roll.

Tina Fey

I have a great gynecologist who is as gifted at listening as she is at rectal exams.

Tina Fey

Wieners, punch, and spinning into barfing would later be referred to as the "Paris Hilton".

Tina Fey

Thomas Jefferson - another gorgeous white boy who would not have been interested in me.

Tina Fey

...you can almost hear people’s b-holes tighten. A collective cartoon-mouse squeak of b-hole.

Tina Fey

Defective" was a big word in our house. Many things were labeled "defective" only to miraculously turn functional once the directions had been read more thoroughly.

Tina Fey

How can I give her what Don Fey gave me? The gift of anxiety. The fear of getting in trouble. The knowledge that while you are loved, you are not above the law.

Tina Fey

Politics and prostitution have to be the only jobs where inexperience is considered a virtue. In what other profession would you brag about not knowing stuff?

Tina Fey

The person closest to actually achieving this look is Kim Kardashian, who, as we know, was made by Russian scientists to sabotage our athletes.

Tina Fey