30 Top Tongue In Cheek Steve Carell Quotes

Everyone said to Vincent van Gogh, "You can't be a great painter, you only have one ear." And you know what he said? "I can't hear you.

You

Steve Carell

  

Nothing to me feels as good as laughing incredibly hard.

Me

Steve Carell

  

I have flaws, what are they? Oh, I don't know, I sing in the shower, sometimes I spend too much time volunteering, occasionally I'll hit someone with my car.

Time I

Steve Carell

  

Instead of telling our young people to plan ahead, we should tell them to plan to be surprised.” — Dan Burns

Young

Steve Carell

  

We stole the Statue of Liberty…! [the minions cheer] …the small one, from Las Vegas!” [the cheers stop] — as Gru

Steve Carell

  

It is St Patrick's Day and here at Scranton, that is a huge deal... It is the closest that the Irish will ever get to Christmas.

Will

Steve Carell

  

You all took a life here today. The life of the party.

You Life

Steve Carell

  

I'm not superstitious, but I'm a little stitious.

Steve Carell

  

He turned the gun sideways! That’s a kill shot!

Steve Carell

  

Toby is in HR, which technically means he works for corporate, so he’s really not a part of our family. Also, he’s divorced, so he’s really not a part of his family.

Family

Steve Carell

  

It's not a master plan to do every remake and every recreation of icons. It's just what I've been hired to do.

Steve Carell

  

It was kind of like they were just giving us a toy to play with, to do whatever we wanted with.

Like

Steve Carell

  

In my wildest dreams i never thought- well, I never thought I'd work

Never Dreams I

Steve Carell

  

I think a character in a comedy should not know they`re in a comedy.

Think Character I

Steve Carell

  

Wikipedia is the best thing ever. Anyone in the world can write anything they want about any subject. So you know you are getting the best possible information.

You

Steve Carell

  

You may look around, and see two groups here. White collar, blue collar. But I don’t see it that way. You know why not? Because I am collar-blind.

You I

Steve Carell

  

I'm an early bird and I'm an owl. So I'm wise and I have worms.

I

Steve Carell

  

So Ryan got promoted to corporate, where he is a big fish in a little pond. Where as back here in Scranton I'm still top dog, in a fairly large pond. So who is the real boss, the dog or the fish?

Steve Carell

  

They say that when you find true love, you know within the first 24 hours. Well with Carol I knew within the first 24 minutes... of the second day that I met her.

You Love I

Steve Carell

  

These are not my shoes.

Steve Carell

  

There are ten rules of business that you need to know... You have to play to win, but you need to win to play... I'll give you the other nine after lunch.

You Business Need

Steve Carell

  

Yeah, I went hunting once. Shot a deer in the leg. Had to kill it with a shovel. Took about an hour. Why do you ask?

You I

Steve Carell

  

I ate fiberglass insulation. It wasn’t cotton candy like the guy said… my tummy itches.

Like I

Steve Carell

  

Is it true that if you don’t USE it you LOSE it?

You

Steve Carell

  

I have no idea where my pathetic nature comes from. If I thought about it too long, it would depress me.

Me Nature I

Steve Carell

  

I hate hospitals, in my mind they are associated with sickness.

I

Steve Carell

  

That is a perfectly good mini Christmas tree. We are going to sell that to charity because that is what Christmas is all about.

Steve Carell

  

I am a crazy, rabid squirrel! I want my cookies!” — Hammy, the Squirrel

I

Steve Carell

  

I don`t think of myself as funny- I don`t fill up a room with my humor...I would fail miserably as a stand-up comedian.

Think I

Steve Carell

  

Will I tell them? No, as a Doctor you wouldn't tell a patient if they were dying of cancer.

You Will I

Steve Carell