Authors: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

A collection of quotes by Jerome K. Jerome on humor, idleness, work, sleep, listen, weather, sarcasm, vanity, dreams, poetry and wisdom.

81 Famous Quotes By Jerome K. Jerome, The Celebrated English Essayist And Humorist

Quick Facts

Famous As: Writer

Born On: May 2, 1859

Died On: June 14, 1927

Born In: Caldmore, United Kingdom

Died At Age: 68

Jerome Klapka Jerome was an English author and essayist who is renowned in the English speaking world for his famous comic book ‘Three Men in a Boat’. Jerome grew up in financial hardship since his family fell into hard times and after the death of his parents, he had to seek employment while still a teenager. After working in several jobs including that of an actor, Jerome started writing on comic prose and finally found a degree of recognition in 1885 for his book ‘On the Stage-And Off’ that depicted the life of stage actors. He contributed to the ‘Home Chimes’ magazine and many of his well-known essays and stories were published there. The comic essay collection titled ‘Idle Thoughts of an Idle Fellow’ was published on ‘Home Chimes’ and later on his most famous work, ‘Three Men in a Boat’ was also serialized in the same magazine. Some of his other notable works include ‘Second Thoughts of an Idle Fellow’, ‘Paul Kelver’, ‘Three Men on the Bummel’, ‘All Roads Lead to Calvary’, ‘The Philosopher’s Joke’ and ‘Novel Notes’ among others. Jerome’s works are still read by people all over the world. Through his books, novels, essays and other writings, Jerome K. Jerome said many notable things on several subjects. We have excerpted his famous quotes from his work. Here is a collection of thoughts, quotations and sayings by Jerome K. Jerome that have been scanned from his books, comics, novels and essays.
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I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.

Jerome K. Jerome

Idleness, like kisses, to be sweet must be stolen.

Jerome K. Jerome

I can't sit still and see another man slaving and working. I want to get up and superintend, and walk round with my hands in my pockets, and tell him what to do. It is my energetic nature. I can't help it.

Jerome K. Jerome

I don't know why it should be, I am sure; but the sight of another man asleep in bed when I am up, maddens me.

Jerome K. Jerome

They [dogs] never talk about themselves but listen to you while you talk about yourself, and keep up an appearance of being interested in the conversation.

Jerome K. Jerome

But who wants to be foretold the weather? It is bad enough when it comes, without our having the misery of knowing about it beforehand.

Jerome K. Jerome

It is always the best policy to tell the truth, unless of course you are an exceptionally good liar.

Jerome K. Jerome

Everything has its drawbacks, as the man said when his mother-in-law died, and they came down upon him for the funeral expenses.

Jerome K. Jerome

We must not think of the things we could do with, but only of the things that we can't do without.

Jerome K. Jerome

It is so pleasant to come across people more stupid than ourselves. We love them at once for being so.

Jerome K. Jerome

I don't understand German myself. I learned it at school, but forgot every word of it two years after I had left, and have felt much better ever since.

Jerome K. Jerome

Life is a thing to be lived, not spent; to be faced, not ordered. Life is not a game of chess, the victory to the most knowing; it is a game of cards, one's hand by skill to be made the best of.

Jerome K. Jerome

It is in our faults and failings, not in our virtues, that we touch one another and find sympathy. We differ widely enough in our nobler qualities. It is in our follies that we are at one.

Jerome K. Jerome

I had walked into that reading-room a happy, healthy man. I crawled out a decrepit wreck.

Jerome K. Jerome

It takes 3 girls to tow always; two to hold the rope, and the other one runs round and round, and giggles.

Jerome K. Jerome

I often arrive at quite sensible ideas and judgements, on the spur of the moment. It is when I stop to think that I become foolish.

Jerome K. Jerome

If there is one person I do despise more than another, it is the man who does not think exactly the same on all topics as I do...

Jerome K. Jerome

1lb beefstak, with 1pt bitter beer every 6 hours. 1 ten-mile walk every morning. 1 bed at 11 sharp every night. And don't stuff your head with things you don't understand.

Jerome K. Jerome

We like, we cherish, we are very, very fond of—but we never love again.

Jerome K. Jerome

What the eye does not see, the stomach does not get upset over

Jerome K. Jerome

Cultivate," I said, "a sense of humor. From a humorous point of view this lunch is rather good.

Jerome K. Jerome

George goes to sleep at a bank from ten to four each day, except Saturdays, when they wake him up and put him outside at two.

Jerome K. Jerome

Being poor is a mere trifle. It is being known to be poor that is the sting.

Jerome K. Jerome

I plodded conscientiously through the twenty-six letters, and the only malady I could conclude I had not got was housemaid's knee.

Jerome K. Jerome

It seems to me so shocking to see the precious hours of a man's life - the priceless moments that will never come back to him again - being wasted in a mere brutish sleep.

Jerome K. Jerome

Swearing relieves the feelings - that is what swearing does. I explained this to my aunt on one occasion, but it didn't answer with her. She said I had no business to have such feelings.

Jerome K. Jerome

Idling has always been my strong point.

Jerome K. Jerome

Nothing is easier to write than scenery; nothing more difficult and unnecessary to read.

Jerome K. Jerome

If you are foolish enough to be contented, don't show it, but grumble with the rest; and if you can do with a little, ask for a great deal. Because if you don't you won't get any.

Jerome K. Jerome

Nobody ever loved as he loves, and so, of course, the rest of the world's experience can be no guide in his case.

Jerome K. Jerome

To be misunderstood is the shy man's fate on every occasion; and whatever impression he endeavors to create, he is sure to convey its opposite.

Jerome K. Jerome

Speak truth, and right will take care of itself.

Jerome K. Jerome

It must be eight years since I last saw Joseph Taboys. How pleasant it would be to meet his jovial face again, to clasp his strong hand, and to hear his cheery laugh once more! He owes me 14 shillings, too.

Jerome K. Jerome

If you desire to drain to the dregs the fullest cup of scorn and hatred that a fellow human being can pour out for you, let a young mother hear you call dear baby "it.

Jerome K. Jerome

The more the other party thinks he's having his way, the easier always to get your own.

Jerome K. Jerome

If he were a man of strong mind, it only gave him fits; but a person of mere average intellect it usually sent mad.

Jerome K. Jerome

It is always the best policy to speak the truth, unless, of course, you are an exceptionally good liar.

Jerome K. Jerome

După ce am căutat fără să găsim, se ntmplă să găsim fără să căutăm.

Jerome K. Jerome

Ambition is only vanity ennobled.

Jerome K. Jerome

Montmorency’s ambition in life, is to get in the way and be sworn at.

Jerome K. Jerome

It always is Christmas Eve, in a ghost story. ("Introduction" to TOLD AFTER SUPPER)

Jerome K. Jerome

And we sit there, by its margin, while the moon, who loves it too, stoops down to kiss it with a sister’s kiss, and throws her silver arms around it clingingly.

Jerome K. Jerome

Eat good dinners and drink good wine; read good novels if you have the leisure and see good plays; fall in love, if there is no reason why you should not fall in love; but do not pore over influenza statistics.

Jerome K. Jerome

Oh, give me back the good old days of fifty years ago," has been the cry ever since Adam's fifty-first birthday.

Jerome K. Jerome

Let us play the game of life as sportsmen, pocketing our winnings with a smile, leaving our losings with a shrug.

Jerome K. Jerome

Leave me, before I get over the wall & slay you.

Jerome K. Jerome

I answered that I thought he would never smile again.

Jerome K. Jerome

I can’t say I altogether blame the man (which is doubtless a great relief to his mind).

Jerome K. Jerome

The chief beauty of this book lies not so much in its literary style, or in the extent and usefulness of the information it conveys, as in its simple truthfulness.

Jerome K. Jerome

It is only the first baby that takes up the whole of a woman's time.Five or six do not require nearly so much attention as one.

Jerome K. Jerome

I like work. it fascinates me. I can sit and stare at it for hours

Jerome K. Jerome

Evil thought is a dangerous pet. It is safer to play with it from behind the iron bars of circumstance.

Jerome K. Jerome

Don't rely too much upon that unsteady flicker.

Jerome K. Jerome

I do like cats. They are so unconsciously amusing. There is such a comic dignity about them, such a "How dare you!" "Go away, don't touch me" sort of air.

Jerome K. Jerome

And we would all try to do it in our heads, and all arrive at different results, and sneer at one another.

Jerome K. Jerome

Idling has always been my strong point. I take no credit to myself in the matter-it is a gift.

Jerome K. Jerome

Man, if he would live, must worship. He looks around, and what to him, within the vision of his life, is the greatest and the best, that he falls down and does reverence to.

Jerome K. Jerome

It was quick work. He came, he saw, I conquered!

Jerome K. Jerome

What I'm looking for is a blessing not in disguise.

Jerome K. Jerome

It is in the petty details, not in the great results, that the interest of existence lies.

Jerome K. Jerome

The truth is, we each of us have an inborn conviction that the whole world with everybody and everything in it, was created as a sort of necessary appendage to ourselves.

Jerome K. Jerome

It seems to be the rule of this world. Each person has what he doesn’t want, and other people have what he does want.

Jerome K. Jerome

A boy's love comes from a full heart; a man's is more often the result of a full stomach.

Jerome K. Jerome

If my name was on a serious work like this it would never get fair treatment. They would all say I had tried to be funny and failed.

Jerome K. Jerome

We must not think of the things we could do with, but only of the things that we can’t do without.

Jerome K. Jerome

I should never make anything of a fisherman. I had not got sufficient imagination

Jerome K. Jerome

Cassivelaunus had prepared the river for Caesar, by planting it full of stakes (and had, no doubt, put up a notice-board).

Jerome K. Jerome

It is not that I object to the work, mind you; I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours. I love to keep it by me: the idea of getting rid of it nearly breaks my heart.

Jerome K. Jerome

There is no pathos in real misery, no luxury in real grief.

Jerome K. Jerome

Splendid cheeses they were, ripe and mellow, and with a two hundred horse-power scent about them that might have been warranted to carry three miles, and knock a man over at two hundred yards.

Jerome K. Jerome

Nature was beautiful, even in her tears

Jerome K. Jerome

Such is life; and we are but as grass that is cut down, and put into the oven and baked.

Jerome K. Jerome

If he didn`t want his opinion,why did he ask for it?

Jerome K. Jerome

Affection will burn cheerily when the white flame of love is flickered out. Affection is a fire that can be fed from day to day and be piled up ever higher as the wintry years draw nigh.

Jerome K. Jerome

I like idling when I ought not to be idling; not when it is the only thing I have to do.

Jerome K. Jerome

It is a most remarkable thing. I sat down with the full intention of writing something clever and original; but for the life of me I can't think of anything clever and original--at least, not at this moment.

Jerome K. Jerome

It all comes of being so attractive, as the old lady said when she was struck by lightning.

Jerome K. Jerome

Let us gather together in the great cities, and light huge bonfires of a million gas-jets, and shout and sing together, and feel brave.

Jerome K. Jerome

There must be something ghostly in the air of Christmas — something about the close, muggy atmosphere that draws up the ghosts, like the dampness of the summer rains brings out the frogs and snails.

Jerome K. Jerome