Authors: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

A collection of quotes and thoughts by Dennis Miller on humor, funny, acting, comedy, tracking, feminism, inspirations, motivation and cracking.

11 Dennis Miller Quotes For Your Daily Doze Of Laughter

Quick Facts

Famous As: Comedian, Radio personality, Actor, Film producer, Writer, Podcaster, Journalist

Born On: November 3, 1953

Born In: Pittsburgh

Dennis Miller is an acclaimed American comedian, actor and talk-show host known for his prolific humor skills. During the initial days of his career he did stand-ups in many local clubs and his skills fascinated the famous producer Lorne Michaels. He offered him a significant role in his popular show ‘Saturday Night Live’ where he was appreciated and it turned out to be a major breakthrough in his career. He got instant fame due to his comic skill and played his character successfully for the next six seasons. He further went on to host ‘The Dennis Miller Show’ but his show was unsuccessful and was soon went off the air. He further co-produced and hosted his own show called ‘Dennis Miller Live’, which turned out to be a great success and brought him a couple of 'Emmy Awards’. Miller is a multi-faceted person and he has been successful in various other fields apart from comedy. He worked as a sports commentator for a popular sports television series titled "Monday Night Football”. He has also worked in some successful movies like ‘Disclosure in 1994’ and ‘The Net’ and has even produced a movie titled ‘Tales From the Crypt Presents: Bordello of Blood’. His continues to entertain his audience with his shows, comic timing, work, thoughts, writings and movies. We have collected his popular quotes from hiw shows, films and life. Presenting a collection of quotations and sayings by Dennis Miller which will give you your share of gaiety.

A recent police study found that you're much more likely to get shot by a fat cop if you run.

Dennis Miller

Jack Kerouac was cool because he had no idea he was.

Dennis Miller

I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman where the Self Help section was. She said if she told me it would defeat the purpose.

Dennis Miller

Quote: You've got bad eating habits if you use a grocery cart in 7-Eleven okay?

Dennis Miller

America may be the best country in the world, but that's kind of like being the valedictorian of summer school.

Dennis Miller

There's nothing wrong with being shallow as long as you're insightful about it.

Dennis Miller

When I went to college, I lived on campus, and the guys I hung out with made the characters in Revenge of the Nerds look like the Rat Pack in 1962. I, myself made that kid Booger look like Remington Steele.

Dennis Miller

A developer is someone who wants to build a house in the woods. An environmentalist is someone who already has a house in the woods.

Dennis Miller

It's your living room, it's your life, go nuts. You like Home Improvement? Tape it and go over it like it's the Zapruder film.

Dennis Miller

And by the way, my belief is that if men were the ones getting pregnant, abortions would be easier to get than food poisoning in Moscow

Dennis Miller

Guilt is the reason they put articles in Playboy.

Dennis Miller